“We are born in relationship, we are wounded in relationship, and we can be healed in relationship.”
– Harville Hendrix
The Way I Work with Couples
I believe that each relationship is a unique and dynamic space, with each partner contributing to and taking from this space. A relationship requires work and commitment to overcome the obstacles and challenges it will inevitably encounter over time.
You each bring your own “baggage” into the relationship shaped by past and early experiences. This baggage influences how you communicate, respond to conflict, manage difficult situations, perceive each other, and set needs and expectations.
When working with me, I will help you unpack this baggage. There may be items that no longer serve you, some you wish to keep or modify, and new ones you might want to incorporate. Together we will work to improve your communication and deepen your understanding of each other. By doing so, we aim to transition your relationship to where you would like it to be.
For a relationship to survive and thrive, it requires effort and dedication. Couples counselling can be a challenging process involving risk-taking, vulnerability, making changes, and honesty. Through our exploration, I will help you identify and build these essential skills.
I use tools and techniques from Psychodynamic and CBT approaches, as well as elements of the IMAGO model. I aim to provide an equal and fair approach to both partners, keeping your relationship at the centre of our work.
I offer a free 20-minute online consultation, where we can discuss whether my services are right for you and how we might work together moving forward.
How Can Couples Counselling Help Us?
There are various reasons why a couple might seek therapy. Here are some of the outcomes you might experience as a result of couples counselling:
- Improving Communication: Sometimes a couple’s dynamic is affected by the difficulty in expressing thoughts, feelings, individual needs and wants. Couples counselling can help you explore and enhance your communication with each other.
- Conflict Resolution: Conflicts are inevitable in any relationship and can offer opportunities for growth. How you respond to them matters. Exploring your responses to conflicts and recurring conflicts, can provide a deeper understanding of your relationship and inform constructive ways to resolve future conflicts.
- Rebuilding Trust: Events such as infidelity or dishonesty can severely impact a relationship. Counselling provides a safe space to put all your cards on the table, discuss what’s happening, and address what you may be holding back from each other.
- Enhancing Intimacy: If you feel disconnected, couple counselling can help you explore the barriers to intimacy and how to overcome them, supporting you to reconnect with each other.
- Navigating Life Transitions: Couples often face significant events that can impact their relationship such as starting a family, experiencing loss, career changes, relocation or even ending the relationship. Counselling provides support to navigate these transitions.
How Can Couples Counselling Help Us?
There are various reasons why a couple might seek therapy. Here are some of the outcomes you might experience as a result of couples counselling:
- Improving Communication: Sometimes a couple’s dynamic is affected by the difficulty in expressing thoughts, feelings, individual needs and wants. Couples counselling can help you explore and enhance your communication with each other.
- Conflict Resolution: Conflicts are inevitable in any relationship and can offer opportunities for growth. How you respond to them matters. Exploring your responses to conflicts and recurring conflicts, can provide a deeper understanding of your relationship and inform constructive ways to resolve future conflicts.
- Rebuilding Trust: Events such as infidelity or dishonesty can severely impact a relationship. Counselling provides a safe space to put all your cards on the table, discuss what’s happening, and address what you may be holding back from each other.
- Enhancing Intimacy: If you feel disconnected, couple counselling can help you explore the barriers to intimacy and how to overcome them, supporting you to reconnect with each other.
- Navigating Life Transitions: Couples often face significant events that can impact their relationship such as starting a family, experiencing loss, career changes, relocation or even ending the relationship. Counselling provides support to navigate these transitions.
Next Steps:
Whether you’re ready to embark on this journey or still uncertain about what it might involve, I invite you to get in touch and discuss it further.
I offer a free 20-minute online consultation where you can share what brought you to couple counselling and ask any questions to help you make a decision.
If you decide to move forward, I will offer you an assessment session. During this session, we will discuss the history of your relationship, the presenting issues, and your expectations and goals for the therapeutic process. I will explain what I can offer and provide an overview of how we will work together. After the assessment session, you will have time to consider your next steps.
Once we agree to work together, I typically contract for six consecutive sessions, including a review at the end of this period, during which we can decide on further steps.